Intuitive perception.........

"For God Himself works in our souls, in the deepest depths, taking increasing control as we are progressively willing to be prepared for His wonder."

I have been misguided by my intuitive perception or insight to the essential meaning of faith. You see, two very important people in my life are struggling with terminal health issues and this tragedy has taken me to a very dark arena. I love these two individuals so very much and they both have played an important role in my life, more than I could ever express in a blog.... They have also been in my life for such a long time I often find it hard to remember a time when they were not in my thoughts nor in my heart. With that said I have found a place to hide from the cruel facts of life, a place where I felt harbored from pain, a place where I thought I could escape..... and that place is called depression. I realize such a coping mechanism is NOT acceptable nor a way to get thru difficult times and overburdened thoughts in one's life. I have not done much about this but swim in my sea of doubt and I felt as though I was drowning.

This morning (here in CA it is 6:30 am) I happen to turn on my t.v. and something struck me as if I were hit by a "lightning" bolt. I walked away from the kitchen and gave my attention to the t.v. announcer as Pope Benedict was entering St. Patrick's Cathedral.... and as I watched the crowds, delirious with joy to simply be in the presence of God's most highly revered Shepherd I fell to my knees. Yes, I am not embellishing this for the sake of writing. I TRULY fell to my knees and started to pray. This Holy man brought me to my knees, where I should have been more often during this course of discernment and angst. I never left God but I never truly handed over my fears, doubts or concerns to him. This morning, April 19th, 2008, at 6:30am I rested my troubles in our Lord and passed him the sword. I cannot fight the fear and solicitude any longer BUT with HIS help I shall embrace it with all I have, and, with HIM by my side I will succeed. I will do this for not only myself, but for the loved ones who stand with me, my family and friends. I will do this for HIM.

It very often amazes me how one moment in one's life can be a critical turning point. I have noticed my moments have always been with HIM by my side. I am going to continue watching this most reverent servant of God, Pope Benedict and take pleasure in the Mass he shall deliver. May you all be blessed by his presence, may our country and other countries be blessed by his presence and may we all find our paths in life, difficult as they may be, blessed by his presence.
Embrace HIM, Marylou;)

And because there must be laughter in our lives I wish to share this quote by Pope Benedict himself when he became our new Pope, and he said.....“We were looking for a 'good shepherd,' and instead we got a German shepherd.”
Pope Benedict XVI quote
Gotta just love a Holy man who can make the world SMILE;)

~I am Here~

The music is playing but I cannot hear it.....the birds are singing but I cannot enjoy the rhythm of their chirps. The flowers are blooming but I am unaware of their beauty. Best get this darn body movin' and groovin'. I know I need to take time to appreciate all that surrounds me but times have been harsh lately, happens to everyone and it appears this is my season for disappointments. I will get thru this and I shall return to blogging and chattin' up a storm with all my dear friends, soon, not sure when but I will return and I promise myself I shall make the time to stop and smell the roses;)
I simply need to not only HUG LIFE, but to EMBRACE it!!
Marylou

~My World is Upside Down~

Ever feel like this???? I have and I do!!
I have been busy and I must confess that all I have been doing is "foolin' around"....:) But ya know what? I think that sometimes in life WE all need to simply have fun. Now, don't misconstrue my message here.... I have not had the pleasure of a Hawaiian vacation, or a trip to Italy so don't get all jazzed. I have just been "goofin' off".....I am not even sure I can explain it. Suffice it to say I have dust bunnies hiding, laundry piling and bills stacking as high as the redwoods.......BUT......in all this confusion I have been able to delude myself and rationalize to DH that everything is under control....LMAO;) Hey, life is short and sometimes ya just gotta stop and smell the roses;) As my friend Amy would say, YIPPY SKIPPY!!
Hug Life, Marylou

~WHAT A GAME~

Okay, you may have seen the game, maybe not, but for me the highlight, after the New York Giants BEAT New England, was this commercial. This was pure brillance, and in my father-in-law's home our small group voted for our own MVP, which was a tie of course:) Thunder and the Dalmation both won;)Click on and enjoy!!
Hug Life, Marylou

~MY BAD~

Hiya ladies in blogland:-) I have been lolling and fritting my time away, spending too much energy on non issues and before I knew it I missed the chance to celebrate my wonderful friends most special day:( I have no excuses other than my usual backup, my A.D.D. but I respect and adore this gal too much to even try that with her. I have been frolicking on You Tube way toooooo much!!! So, to my dear friend Ellen, a belated 39th Happy Birthday and may all your wishes come true!!!
ps..AND what a PRETTY friend she is:-)WOOT!!
Hug Life, Marylou

~AND IT RAINED, RAINED & RAINED~

This picture is my driveway, where the cone is placed, on Friday which had about 2 feet of water at that point, more came. The fire trucks and city services arrived just in time to pump the water out and we were lucky, no damage to our home. We all have our own pumps due to our property arrangements, our homes being lower than the street level. Across the street from us is a city maintained drain that never works when we have a big storm. Friday's storm was the biggest in our local history, almost 8" of rainfall. I called DH from work and he came home. My son came to help out as well. Again, we were fortunate not to have any severe water damage but some of our neighbors were not so lucky. I am NOT complaining as I have seen what happened in Nevada and how many people incurred devastating damages.

Most importantly I am writing this post because yesterday my DH went to Sausalito where our boat is docked to make sure she was okay. Well, the San Francisco bay had 100 mph winds and our sail boat cover was torn to shreds. Other boats had the same damages...I was upset as the cost to repair is not in our budget now and the boat has not only a monetary value but she is my DH's second love, MOI being his first:) As I was complaining about the cost to repair, oh what shall we do, yada..yada...my DH was quiet on the other end of the phone and I could not figure out why other than he was sad because of the boat's loss........duh....sometimes I am so selfish I could kick myself. Lucky for me my foot can't reach my rear end! I asked him, why so down and out. We will figure a way to fix this. He said he had just learned that our dock neighbor, a professional diver, went out the day of the storm to aid someone in need and did not have his wet suit on, was tossed in the water due to the high swells and, well...he did not survive his brave attempt:(

So, I have made myself a promise again, I make this promise every so often and I loose perspective, so AGAIN, my promise is to never take the loss of anything monetary that serious again!!! This young man lost his life in his endeavor to come to the aid of another, THAT IS WHAT I CALL LOSS! Too sad to say much more other than thank you all in blogland for giving me this format to vent. I am grateful for that more than you know.
Take care, don't fret about the small stuff and remember, HUG LIFE......Marylou:(

~FOR BELLA~AKA, MARY@ISABELLAS CLOSET~

Dear Mary,

Please remember what I told you about Spring, it will be here before we know it:-) You can see us here planting together. We do that you see, you and I. Oh, maybe not in person since we live so far apart geographically, but in our hearts. You send me an email filled with seeds that in turn are filled with love. I accept those seeds and plant them here in my heart ^-^ and a true friendship begins to take root and grow!! I have so many blossoms from you dear friend that my bouquet is full so I would like to return the favor and send you a few of those dear seeds!! May they grow in your heart as they have in mine and may they occupy every vessel in your home and in your spirit. Take care my dear friend and KNOW how many of us are praying for you! Mary, it shall soon be Spring and we shall reap the harvest of our difficult winter...take care.
Hug Life, Marylou

~ A PRAYER & A HOPE~

I have borrowed wisdom from some wise & holy servants, kindly read them. I believe them to be relevant in today's current affairs.

"Be the change you want to see in the world. All the religions of the world, while they may differ in other respects, unitedly proclaim that nothing lives in this world but Truth."
Mohandas Gandhi
"We must become the change we want to see."
Mahatma Gandhi
"Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and the messenger will be rejected"
"Nonviolence is a weapon of the strong"
Mahatma Gandhi

In making my post for the New Year my thoughts were obscured considering the recent happenings in our world of "lost" HUMANITIES .....I was feeling adrift, cynical, demoralized, irreparable and defeated, exactly how "they" wanted me to feel!!

So, with some thought I decided to make this a purposeful & tenacious post, truthful and most importantly HOPEFUL. With that being said

I WANT TO WISH EVERYONE, WORLDWIDE A MOST REFRESHING & CHANGING NEW YEAR. MAY 2008 BRING US THE COURAGE TO STAND UP FOR WHAT IS ETHICAL, TO SPEAK OUR MINDS, TO AIR OUR DIFFERENCES, TO DEBATE OUR POLITICS, BUT, MOST IMPORTANTLY TO DO SO WITH PLACIDITY, TRANQUILITY AND with PEACE IN OUR HEARTS:)

I realize that sounds like a very heavy purpose, but I like to think it can be accomplished. If it only means that one person smiles at his neighbor, one person tosses a dollar in a homeless persons hat, one person signs up for local volunteer duty, one person reclaims their faith, one person gives what is so invaluable, their TIME to aid a productive cause then wouldn't our New Year start off well:) Let's all be that one person, which in turn will be many!!

God Bless us all, God Bless the USA, and God Bless those with hate in their hearts, may they find love & the path to freedom............ Cheers to a new and aspiring, constructive and positive 2008!!!

Now, go out there and not only Hug Life, Embrace it with all you have and all you are ^-^

HAPPY NEW YEAR AND MAY 2008 BRING US ALL THAT IS "GOOD" AND MAY WE SHARE ALL THE "GOOD" THAT IS IN US:)

~A GREAT LOSS~

I AM AT A LOSS FOR WORDS. ALL I HAVE LEFT IN ME ARE PRAYERS FOR MS. BHUTTO AND HER LOVED ONES.

~CURMUDGEONLY~

I have re-read my last post a few times and I believe I have made a HUGE mistake!! I have been complaining about the actions of others and insinuating that their bad behavior has given Christmas a surly message. WRONG!! This would only be true if I ALLOWED this to happen. CHRISTmas is a "moment in time" to celebrate the most amazing "moment in time" for all Christians, and if I am to profess to Christianity than I must behave in a Christian fashion!! I do not have the right to judge nor should I. I do not have the right to complain, nor should I. I do not have the right to decide what is right for others, nor should I. With that made clear I SIMPLY WANT TO WISH EVERYONE A VERY, MERRY CHRISTMAS. I hope and pray that we will someday not worry about anger, resentments, wars, poverty, sickness and the more frivolous things I previoulsy mentioned....... gifts, traffic and personality flaws....but until that day I shall THANK GOD for ALL the goodness in our world we so often forget to acknowledge.

There is such beauty around us from our glorious & abundant mountain ranges to our capacious azure oceans...There is such beauty around us including kind & loving people of all races and creeds...There is such beauty around us as there are those that give of themselves to offer help to those in need and to those wonderful peeps I say AMEN and THANK YOU. May this season find you all healthy, prosperous and loved.......... and may I remember all of the above:-)
HUG LIFE, Marylou

~The Last Christmas~

See this little kitty, cute isn't she?? But sad:( Well, we were chatting and we both felt rather discouraged as it seems to US that Christmas is simply NOT what it used to be. I remember when you could walk into a store and hear Christmas music, or you could stop in town and see a grand Nativity display or you would see the smiling faces of people, excited to make their Christmas purchases and return home to wrap their presents, decorate their tree and make some egg nog!! Well, it seems like that is all a memory. I do not hear the music, nor do I see the Nativity scene and I think people are usually in such a hurry and well, gosh, they are simply behaving badly!! Cars are honking at me cause I am not driving fast enough and some go as far as to wave at me with one finger????? AND...what is up with this HAPPY HOLIDAYS greeting?? Is it Arbor Day? Memorial Day? St. Patricks Day???? NO, it is Christmas. Therefore why can't we say MERRY CHRISTMAS?????ARGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!I wish we could get back to the way things were but I am afraid with all this nonsense of separation of church and state activists have taken things simply too far.......and they have taken away MY RIGHT to have a MERRY CHRISTMAS. Last time I checked this country of ours was founded on the right to celebrate GOD and I don't believe we changed any of the Constitution lately, although there are those who would like to!! So, with that said I would like to wish everyone a very MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR. I TRULY DON'T CARE HOW YOU CELEBRATE AND I RESPECT THE FASHION IN WHICH YOU DO SO.... IF IT IS A MENORAH, A BUDDA OR A FIG LEAF BLESS YOU AS IT DOES NOT MATTER AN INFINITESIMAL DEGREE TO ME, JUST PLEASE BE SURE TO CELEBRATE!!!
And, Please Don't Forget to..............Hug Life, Marylou ^-^

~THEN AND NOW~

Well, a few things have changed from my last post:) The kids are now adults and living on their own, decorating their own homes! Whoa.....again, not sure where the time went but the train certainly left the depot and I was not aboard:( So, this is my tree for 2007....smaller and I noticed the ornaments have slightly changed. I used to have the most precious ornies ever, made by the kids. Usually a round ball with their name in glitter, a home made critter made from walnut shells and the obligatory but fun school picture framed with popcicle sticks:-) I have saved them all and may package them in a neat box with a ribbon as a Christmas gift, one for Tony and one for Francesca. They can add them to their trees and share with their children who I hope will be conceived during my lifetime!!!!!!! (big grin here) I took some pics so you can now see more boating thingys (DH loves sailing) and I notice more squirrels ^-^. My Nativity Set is smaller in size but not in faith!!! Of all that has grown, the most precious to me is my faith. Each day I come closer to our Lord and I am so grateful for that:) Enjoy a fews pics of my Nativity, my sailor's fave ornies and my squirrels. Nothing fancy but all showing our loves, our faith and our hopes and dreams. AND our gratitude for each day God gives us:) May you all have your own hopes and dreams and may you all have a stong faith, no matter the religion, just be sure you have a higher being you can trust and pray to, that is all it takes:)
Hug Life, Marylou

~YESTERDAY~

Yes it was only yesterday:-) Well, not quite:( This picture was taken in 1993 and my daughter was home for Christmas from college. Helping her decorate the tree was her brother who was 14 years old. She is now 32 and he is 28...where have the years gone?? I tell ya, life happened and someone forgot to tell me. How can I have two grown children, I am a young, youthful gal:-) Well, gal is correct ^-^ I was looking thru some boxes of pics and wanted to share with ya. I passed by the ones of the kids when they were 4, 5 and 6..too painful!! This one was difficult enough!! Nah..I am not complaining. I am so "blessed" to be their mom and have the wonderful family & life I have:) I just wanna know how long I was in the coma????????????????
HUG LIFE, Marylou

~Wasn't It Just Easter??????????~

Okay, correct me if I am wrong but wasn't it just Easter??? I know Thanksgiving came early this year, we are still in the month of November with a whole week left and yesterday I saw cars toting their freshly purchased Christmas trees home!!! How are they gonna keep those puppies green till Christmas? Even in water my trees when bought during the first week of December dry, droop and drizzle by Christmas Eve and I like to keep her up till after New Years so by then I have that "Charlie Brown" tree syndrome:-( I digress, back to the issue at hand. I could have sworn I was just basting the Easter Ham and this past Thursday I had a Turkey in the oven. YIKES....time is going by and everyone forgot to tell me!!! I know, I am simply getting older...bawaaaaahhhaaaaaa....I don't mind aging, BUT God, please don't let me forget it:-) Well, I have made a list for DH today. Gotta get the Christmas lights up outside, pull my boxed Christmas decorations out of the black hole (the black hole is my name for our garage, once something is placed in there it is never to be found again) I imagine I should prepare the fireplace mantle for my clever new Christmas decor, uhuh, the same one I have used for the past 7 years or so:) Now, I am NOT complaining...I love Christmas. I just want to make sure it doesn't happen without ME!! Happy Holidays ya all!
Hug Life, Marylou
ps. I think I had better check my Zen manual for all this, there must be some chant or meditation I can incorporate for ENJOYING EACH DAY AS IT COMES ^-^

~HAPPY THANKSGIVING~

Not just this Thanksgiving day but every day I am thankful for the many gifts that surround me. The appreciation I hold for the beauty of our crisp blue skies, twinkling stars, cresting seas, curvaceous mountains AND the cherished love of our family and friends overwhelms me. These are my most precious and sacred gifts which I hold dear to my heart each and every new day God grants me. To all of you amazing, brave & generous gals in blogland I wish for you the most wonderful Thanksgiving Day:) Enjoy the turkey & gravy & pumpkin pie, BUT, RELISH with PASSION the loved ones you sit and share your meal with:)AND..........don't ever forget to:
Hug Life, Marylou

Giving Thanks

For the hay and the corn and the wheat that is reaped,
For the labor well done, and the barns that are heaped,
For the sun and the dew and the sweet honeycomb,
For the rose and the song and the harvest brought home --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!

For the trade and the skill and the wealth in our land,
For the cunning and strength of the workingman's hand,
For the good that our artists and poets have taught,
For the friendship that hope and affection have brought --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!

For the homes that with purest affection are blest,
For the season of plenty and well-deserved rest,
For our country extending from sea unto sea;
The land that is known as the "Land of the Free" --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!

~Author Unknown

~~~~~~~~

~ZEN KITTY~

Wavy Gravy once asked a Zen Roshi, "What happens after death?"
The Roshi replied, "I don't know."
Wavy protested, "But you're a Zen Master!"
"Yes," the Roshi admitted, "but I'm not a dead Zen Master."
Well, since most of what I have learned so far is 10 fold over and beyond my comprehension I resort to humor:-) Yes, my name is Marylou and I am addicted to humor!!

I have been learning about "sitting" (zazen) which is the meditative portion of ZEN, the most important. It involves the position of ones spine, breathing properly and being a contortionist:) JK.....Once you are in a "sitting" position on a cushion, legs crossed with your feet resting on your thighs, hands together with thumbs touching leveled at your navel, eyes open but sorta closed, it's not as simplistic as is sounds, you may begin:) If one cannot clear one's mind and center himself then ZEN is not really gonna work for ya....the analogy used in my book refers to "jumping monkeys"...YEP...apparently we all have "jumping monkeys" in our minds and we need to rid ourselves of them to find clarity. Anyone gotta bunch of bananas????? I am condensing here immensely and taking liberal license, but since it is MY blog I don't have any issues with that. I am having difficulties with clearing my mind...no snide remarks please, have gotten those from my loved ones and let me simply say this, they only said it one time!!!!! I am still on my path, trying to find my way ZEN style. I may have to make a few adjustments here and there and decide what works best for me. To be a complete ZEN student one must be very disciplined and this is an attribute lacking in my "being" so I have taken a few shortcuts here and there. I think as long as I stay on the path, Dharma, I may certainly choose which fork in the road to follow:) Now, go out there and free yourself of those darn monkeys, find clarity, be at peace with the world and don't forget to............HUG LIFE!!! Marylou

~FRIENDS~

Last night I had the pleasure of chatting with our dear friend Carole. So ladies here is the scoop:) She is doing well, her attitude is "fantabulous" and she is one strong woman!! She is having frequent physical therapy visits but considering what she has been thru this gal is moving forward. The computer is still difficult for her but she will return to blogging as soon as she can. She sends her love to all and thanks everyone for the kind messages and good wishes:)

We could have spoken for hours, two kindred pals with many seasons in common. She is the yin of my yang:-) Her engaging spirit and affable manner touches my heart.... The beauty of her words and gentle kindness left me in awe of this lady I call my comrade, buddy & pal.

I am so happy and I feel so blessed to be considered her friend so I leave you with this message:

"OF ALL THE BLOSSOMS IN LIFE'S GARDEN,
FRIENDSHIP IS THE MOST FRAGRANT"
Hug Life, Marylou:)

~RELAX~

I have been doing alot of nothing lately:) Don't ya just love when that happens?? Yesterday was nada, today was zip and tomorrow is I don't know:-) Well, the truth be told I have been up to something...now, please don't anyone get their panties in a knot on this one because I am a Christian gal. With much research I have learned one can be of faith and also delve in Zen! Yep...I have been listening to Gregorian Chants and reading about Zen. Trying to uncomplicate my life and make this process as basic as I can for myself and my family. I told DH he can come along for the ride or bear my rath......so........he has chosen wisely:-) I am only in the beginning stages of learning so I shall keep you all posted and current with my progress. Wish me luck with my journey into the realm of calmness, tranquility and placidity.
Peace and Hug Life, Zen style:) Marylou

~THANK YOU~

My son is home, safe and sound! I want to thank all of you who so givingly shared your prayers for him and his comrades. I can't begin to explain the relief I feel and I am so eternally grateful for the ANGELS he had surrounding him and his brothers as they fought this horrific inferno. I will certainly keep vigil for those still on duty, not only in Southern CA but for all those fine young men and women who are in some way serving a civic or national duty in our name.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL AND MAY YOU ALL ARRIVE HOME SAFELY:)
Hug life, Marylou

~What They Don't Tell You~

I received my first phone call from my son yesterday. He is safe and for that I am so grateful. Thank you for your circle of prayers:)

What you don't hear on the news......My son informed me that the generosity of people has been over whelming. The firefighters have been given plenty of food, water, along with love and appreciation...and all this from strangers. It is an amazing community that has embraced these brave men and women and the out pour of volunteers has been staggering. The victims (yes that is how I feel for the poor souls who lost their homes and precious belongings since it is being called arson) are also feeling this tremendous giving experience. They may have lost their homes but not their spirit and for that I am grateful. I am in awe of the constant kindness that surrounds the raging inferno, what a beautiful display of strength, faith & hope from those who have lost so much. I am PROUD that my son is able to be simply "one" of many who are able to participate in the saving and healing process. I am honored to be "human" today:) We can be such an incredible species and I certainly prefer our behavior when we act in this fashion. No hate, no wars, no disenchantment with each others faith, ethnicity or class. Life can be wonderful even after tragedy.

The fires are still burning so please keep everyone in your daily prayers. Thanks so very much:)

Hug Life......Marylou
PS...My son shook the hand of the President of the United States yesterday! He had his picture taken with him along with the rest of the crew and I will receive a copy and proudly display it in my home. My son shall never forget that moment as the President thanked him and each member of the Novato Fire Dept. individually for their service. I shall never forget the pride in my son's voice as he shared this moment with me via phone. OH...my, life is so GOOD:)